The ONE Thing You Need Today, To Get Everything You Want Tomorrow

by Alexander Heyne · 14 comments

Courage fearThere is only one thing you need to get everything you want in life.

The brutal truth is that life is not easy.

Maybe you’re the kind of person sitting in a 9-5 job that pays your bills, but you are bored as hell with your life. You feel like you haven’t created a single memory in the past three years. Nothing has changed at all. It scares the shit out of you. “Am I going to die like this?”

Or maybe you’re the “dream A.D.D.” person. Your focus/passion/dream changes every six months. You burn hot and strong but you fizzle out quickly. Years elapse, or decades, and you almost never make any progress. Five years ago you were no closer than you are now.

Maybe still you’re just in a really shitty place in life. No job. Depressed. Wondering what your great purpose/passion is in life, and you’re struggling to try and “figure it all out.”

Here’s the thing: you only need one thing to solve your problems.

And that one thing is called courage.

Quit your job and find your passion?


I’ve got many friends that are in the “comfortably numb” stage of their lives. They went to good schools, got good jobs, and now have “good lives.” They live in big cities, work jobs they’re supposed to, are mostly bored as hell, are boring as hell, and have a long list of things they’d rather be doing than going to work. Understandable.

I’m the only one in my circle that is working hard to change my reality. When I get home from my dayjob, I go and spend another four hours a day on my business. It’s sometimes agonizing to see weeks fly by without my knowing it, but it’s something I enjoy and something that will replace my dayjob in a few years.

Naturally, my friends are both curious and a bit envious – I mean who doesn’t want to quit their dayjob and do something they actually like?

When I ask them why they don’t do the same, I get the same answer, and here’s how it begins:

“Eh…I just…. <insert reason/excuse/artificial wall>”

The truth is that no matter what my friends say, they aren’t “going for it” because they’re too comfortable.

Comfort is seductive, deadly, and insidious. Even if you show up to a job you don’t like, if you don’t have a burning hatred for it 24/7, you’ll leave it at the door and forget about it when you go home.

So during the hours of 9-5 you HATE your job, but then five o’clock rolls around and it’s “wahooo!!!” and you forget about it. Go home, self-medicate, rinse and repeat. You never fully hate your job enough to make the move.

The unknown scares the shit out of them. Many people choose comfort and misery over stepping into the darkness and potentially living the dream.

What you – and they – need is courage.

It takes bravery to invest 1,000 hours a year into something that might vaporize into thin air and fail. It takes bravery to decide that, hey, I’m 50 years old but I’m going to take night classes for 4 years to finally pursue something I actually like. Something that fills the void.

The exceptional life requires bravery.

You’re in the wrong relationship

You’re in the wrong relationship, and you know it… or you have a small inkling of a feeling. But you say to yourself “he’s fine. He’s a good guy. He’s good enough… why bother leave if it’s working fine?” But deep down you know he probably isn’t the one.

Been there? Any of us that have been in “failed” relationships have been there. One of the partners realized, “Yeah I can’t see myself with this person” and the rest is history.

But what happens if you’re in a “good” relationship, and not a great one? You’re settling because you say “good enough”. He/she’s not exactly what I want, but what are the chances of me finding someone better?

Wrong question. The absolute worst question. You are making a massive life decision not because you are passionate about it, but because you’re afraid. You’re living a little life and smothering all your potential. I’m not saying to have high standards or not be content. I’m just saying if you know it’s not right – make the leap, even if it scares you.

It takes courage to step into the dark and say “you know, this is good an all, but you aren’t the right one.” Actually, it’s scary as hell. It may leave you more depressed than you’ve ever been in your life. But a few years later you’ll look back and say “I’m glad I made that decision.” You’ll know you made the right one.

Sometimes the decisions that make us feel the absolute worst now are the ones we most need for the future.

Do what you KNOW you have to do… even if it scares the shit out of you. There is a reason why you intuitively know the next move in your life – but often hold back due to fear of the darkness.

The one thing you need right now

Here’s the only thing you need right now.

To find your passion. To live your dream. To “fulfill your destiny.”

You need courage.

You need the kind of courage that lets you drop a bad relationship even though it’s comfortable and safe and secure.

You need the kind of courage keeping you in a shitty, dead-end job that pays your bills but doesn’t nourish you in any other way.

You need the kind of courage to put in 1,000 hours in a year on something you’re crazy about, even if you don’t know whether or not it will pay you enough to ever sustain you.

You need the courage to step into the darkness when you have no idea where the path will lead, just because you know that’s the right next step.

- Alex

P.S. Thoughts on this? Tell me below.

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{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Tony Khuon December 8, 2013 at 5:09 pm

Hey Alex, right on the money with this post. People will put up with a lot of indignity, office politics, and meaningless work to avoid even momentary discomfort. Courage is huge, but so is taking action. Love that you are grinding an extra 4 hours a day after work. I know what that’s like! But every little bit of success de-risks the prospect of quitting your day job and going all-in.

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Karl December 8, 2013 at 5:17 pm

Yes, yes and yes. I am that 50 year old! Job and relationship sort of ok…comfortable…but they are both slowly killing me. I lost myself for years and years. I am in the process of leaving my relationship of 20 years…and I am scared shitless…I don’t know where it will lead…if I can afford it…what about my house? My comfortable life….am I mad?? And I am bored with my job but not sure what else I can do…one step at a time I suppose. It’s hard…and it hurts!

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Alexander Heyne December 12, 2013 at 12:00 pm

Karl,

I totally hear you there. It’s probably scary as hell and a dark road ahead. But I assume you’re doing it because you KNOW it’s what you have to do, yeah?

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Shayna December 8, 2013 at 10:02 pm

Just curious, do your “comfortably numb” friends read your blog? Wondering what they think when you call ‘em out :-p

Hmm, I’ve never had a burning hatred for my day job, but the knowledge that it was NEVER going to get any better than “satisfactory” was enough to propel me into entrepreneurship.

“Courage” doesn’t mean burn all bridges and quit tomorrow without a plan. It could mean starting a side hustle and gradually building it up, like you and I have, only letting go of the day job when we’re fully confident our businesses will sustain us.

But it’s a REAL big mindset shift. An entrepreneur doesn’t ask, “Can I…?” (a question to which the answer is either “yes” or “no” – and anyone can pull a reason for “no” out of their ass) – instead, he/she asks “HOW can I…?” – and finds/makes a way.

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Andrew December 9, 2013 at 6:33 am

Timothy Ferriss summed this up nicely when he said:
“Most people will choose unhappiness over uncertainty.”

Another great quote that springs to mind is:
“When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.”

Be bold.

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Alexander Heyne December 12, 2013 at 11:59 am

Awesome quotes Andrew, and I agree completely!

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Alain December 11, 2013 at 4:46 pm

No guts, no glory is all I have to say.

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Ollie December 12, 2013 at 8:35 pm

Just what I need. Thanks, Alex!

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Alexander Heyne December 16, 2013 at 11:53 am

Cheers Ollie!

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Alex December 15, 2013 at 6:27 pm

Hi Alex,
Thanks for this post, it’s really inspiring, and I have some friends I will also share it with. I take your last phrase which really resignates with me

To find your passion. To live your dream. To “fulfill your destiny.”
You need courage.

And I would add to this the word “believe”. I don’t KNOW, but I believe it will take me there, and that I just have to keep on keeping on. The one in which you were talking about when saying you take 1000 hours and don’t know what the result will be, but the have the intuition and the desire that it will get you were you want to be!

Again, thanks so much for your post, I really enjoyed it a lot!

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Alexander Heyne December 16, 2013 at 11:57 am

Cheers man I’m glad it helped inspire you !

– Alex

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Raymond January 8, 2014 at 3:40 am

Do you have something like finding that courage to make the leap?
I have been reading the blog and I know what I’m supposed to do but as you also said, it’s scary as hell.

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Alexander Heyne January 8, 2014 at 10:15 am

Hi Raymond,

What’s the scariest part for you? Or what’s the worst case scenario?

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Raymond January 10, 2014 at 3:36 am

Thanks a lot for the response.

This one ~ “… don’t know whether or not it will pay you enough to ever sustain you.” ~ I got bills and responsibilities, that’s whats keeping me from doing what I really like. It shouldn’t be a problem if I only look after myself. The thing is, I’ve got dependents (family) that would be directly implicated by my actions.

I also have the same problem regarding wrong relationships but I think, I should just deal with one life changing decision at a time. :-)

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