The Brutal Reality of “Following Your Dreams” – That No One Talks About

by Alexander Heyne · 12 comments

Tropical 2

I get emails all the time from people telling me “If only I found my passion and purpose life would be so easy!”

… And I think these people are sometimes seriously deluded.

The implication in every single one of these emails is that “living your passion” is something that is easy. Just quit your job and follow your passion. Just work on your business and it will blow up if you love it enough and work hard enough.

But the reality is way less sexy. Let me tell you what reality looks like. What the reality of “making your dreams happen” looks like.

Daily hell schedule

I work 9-5 in my dayjob. I go right from work to the gym. I’m home around 6:30/7. I cook dinner. Then I work on my business for 3-5 hours. Then I sleep around midnight.

That’s my entire life right now.

5/6/7 days a week.

You know where you often find me on Friday and Saturday nights? Alone in a cafe working. (Today’s Friday, I’m going right from work to the gym for an hour, then right to a cafe until 9 pm for 3 hours of work before going out). I won’t be home before 10 pm.

Guess what I do on my Saturday and Sunday afternoons? Freelance and meet clients for extra money (to travel), and work on my business and passion projects. Most weekends I set my alarm on Saturday, and Sunday.

Do I still get to travel? Yeah. In fact, this year I took four vacations. Two of them were international trips (costa rica & thailand). I actually spent about 8 weeks on vacation this year, maybe more.

But the truth is that it’s really goddamn exhausting.

I’m not saying this to try and discourage you or anything. I’m saying this to just remind you: yeah, pursuing your destiny, your dream, your passions is 100% worth it – but you will suffer, and you will pay for your success.

In other words, you have to give something to get the life you want. And often you have to give a shitload before you magically “arrive” at the life you want.

And for those of you whose passion might involve building a business or becoming an entrepreneur:

Guess what? If you’ve never done that before, you can look at investing hundreds of hours (like 500) before even earning your first dollar consistently.

Do the math – that’s 1.5 hours a day for a year – and that’s being optimistic. Most of you it will take several years of failures before creating a business that succeeds.

It Ain’t All Unicorns and Rainbows…

Really, what I’ve been going on about here at Milk the Pigeon is a few key things:

  1. You have to figure out what kind of stuff you like (Read this)
  2. You have to figure out what in the hell you want – what success means for you (otherwise you’re a drifting leaf)
  3. You have to figure out what path to take, in other words, how to actually make it happen
  4. You have to work smart, hard, be unique, push yourself, and be comfortable living in discomfort

And the most important one of all.

You have to be content with failing 100x a day.

Seriously, you’re going to fail so much you’re going to cry… and then wonder if driving your car off a cliff would be easier than following the path you’re on now.

The past two years have produced more man-tears and sleepless nights for me than the past 26 combined.

That’s just the nature of the beast.

If you’re jumping into the darkness, following a path few people have blazed, this is just the way it goes. Gotta find the path first. Then you gotta hustle down the path. Then you get lost, and realize you went down the wrong path. Then you realize you got the wrong map.

… Then you start over again, a 100 times, and keep going.

And eventually, you get there.

This is the nature of pursuing your destiny. Doing that which is in your DNA (as Gary V says).

Follow your DNA. Don’t question it.

The Reality is This

Following your dreams, pursuing your passion, building a business, architect-ing your dream life is anything but easy.

Easy is dying slowly in your cubicle, in a boring existence you didn’t even want, that just kinda happened to you.

Easy is drinking yourself retarded on Friday, rather than using that time to take one micro step closer to the life you want.

Easy is just staying paralyzed and not taking action, because anything else requires “effort” and thinking.

… But not everything that’s easy makes you happy, right?

Follow your DNA. Pursue your destiny. Live the life you know you were meant to live.

You will fail 100x a day. I promise you that. You’ll work on something for a year and realize you had the wrong map the entire time.

You’ll talk yourself up immensely, and then get punched in the face by life.

Doesn’t matter.

Just keep going, it’s your own unique path, your mission, and you can’t let it go no matter what.

Plus, one day you’ll arrive. And it will be epic.

- Alex

(Don’t forget to enjoy the ride).

Thoughts? Tell me below.

P.S. Coaching is starting today, and I’ve already started emailing people back. I’m limiting it to 5 spots right now as I test out to see what you guys really wanna make happen in your own life. If you’re ready, watch this video and get started.



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