Life’s Greatest Secret – There Is No Map

by Alexander Heyne · 30 comments

map 2

Yesterday, many pieces came together and I had one of the biggest “aha” revelations of my life.

I want to share it with you because I’m positive it’s going to help you get way more happy, successful, and fulfilled.

People are always looking for the secret. The map.

To the perfect relationship or the perfect marriage. What rules do I follow? What actions do I take? What should I say or not say?

Or we’re looking for “secret” of success. What’s the map I should follow to become the next Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates or Steve jobs?

What book should I read next to make me more successful?

What daily actions should I take in order to crush it?

Maybe it’s the key to happiness.

The happiness movement has exploded in recent years – books are flying off the bookshelves, the positive psychology movement has sprung up, and it’s quite possibly the biggest sub niche inside of personal development that has ever existed.

So what’s the secret to happiness? What should I be doing every day to be happy?

Or for those of you fellow 20 somethings, maybe you want the road map to no longer being lost. You just want a quick formula to follow:  passionate work + good relationship + adventure = no longer being lost.

But here was my huge revelation:

THERE IS NO MAP.

Sounds Scary? It’s Not – Here’s Why That’s Awesome


Look – the past few years I’ve been figuring out how to build an online business.

And I’ve observed why other people have failed, and why I have failed constantly throughout the process many times before having any success. I’ve been in business masterminds and learned that in 18 months I’ve had more success than some people have in 10 years trying to figure out how to start a business.

Most of the time it’s because everyone is wondering “What in the hell am I supposed to be doing?”  And they’re crazy overwhelmed.

There are 100’s of gurus with 100’s of different business models, any one of which could make you quite successful.

If you are trying to build something in life, there are guideposts, but there isn’t really a map. That’s why running a startup is a project in failing a thousand times, figuring shit out, and iterating as quickly as possible.

Yeah you can learn marketing. Yeah you can learn sales. Yeah you can learn how to acquire users. But none of that guarantees anything. It doesn’t guarantee people will want your product or your program or your business.

And that’s something that you have to figure out on your own.

You Just Have to Know the Destination

Clarity is CRAZY important –  If you don’t define success, or don’t define your goals, you won’t reach them, no matter what.

There’s an old Earl Nightingale quote I’m going to butcher, “A steamboat that leaves New York, without a destination in mind, will never reaches its destination because it has no point in mind. But a boat that leaves, with the intention of getting to a specific location on the map, will always get there, 100% of the time, no matter how long it takes – because it can always correct its course.”

If you know exactly what you want, it’s only a matter of time before you get it as long as you’re plugging away every day and grinding.

Weird shit will start happening. Connections will happen.

Even weird coincidences will start happening to push you along the path.

You DON’T have to know how you’re going to get there, before you even begin.

But you HAVE to know where you want to end up.

And then you have to hustle, improve a little bit each day, and know that you will indeed get there.

This is going to make life a hell of a lot better for you.

Because now you can stop stressing out about FINDING the god damn map, and just focus on taking steps forward every single day.

You don’t have to stress out about HOW you’re going to make shit happen. You just have to START making shit happen.

Stop wondering what map to follow, or where the map is, or even WHAT the map is.

Set your marker: I want to get to the north pole.

Take step 1: begin walking.

And embark on the adventure: figure out how to get there.

Stop waiting for permission or some huge revelation, aha moment, or perfect timing.

Mark the destination, take that first step, and figure it out – like every successful person in history before you.

Agree/Disagree? Leave a Comment and Tell Me Below

– Alex

Image: freedigitalphotos.net

Wondering WTF to Do With Your Life & What Your Dream Career is? 

Snag my free report "What The Hell Should I Do With My Life?"

My guide will help you figure out:

  • What the hell to do with your life
  • Why life feels so unfulfilling - even though you might have it all
  • Why pursuing success and searching for happiness actually make you less successful and less happy
Just enter your email below:

{ 29 comments… read them below or add one }

Walter Gillis July 17, 2014 at 2:21 pm

thats essentially the premise of The Book The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho.

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 17, 2014 at 7:01 pm

Walter, it’s my favorite book, so that’s cool you made the comparison :-).

Reply

N. Smith July 17, 2014 at 3:04 pm

LOVE the Nightingale quote – great way to illustrate your point here! I have found out that the clarity issue is huge, perhaps the most important thing of all. (Well, that, and having nerves of steel when you’re attempting all these things.)

Another pull no punches post on MTP. :)

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 17, 2014 at 7:02 pm

Totally Nancy!!

You NEED to watch this talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62DqsD2s5V8

Git r done homegirl!! (And go tigers… hehe).

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 17, 2014 at 7:02 pm

FYI I’m adding that as a homework assignment for when I get back from Belize! Watch it!!

Reply

Connie Kehr July 17, 2014 at 4:52 pm

I really like your ideas. I really dislike your use of cuss words. They distract me from your message. Since your message is not unique, I am unsubscribing from your online business.

Reply

Jude July 17, 2014 at 5:03 pm

First, I just want to say that your posts have really helped me out. I sent you an email this past winter about my predicament of having no passion and being stressed about student loan debt, and your reply really helped me out. I just want to let you know that I did exactly what I said I was going to do: teach English. I saved the money, I left the U.S., I got certified, I got the job, I have the experience, and I’m closer to getting out of debt. The best thing is I met some awesome people in the process too, and I have so much more clarity than I ever had in life.

You are absolutely right about weird coincidences happening to push you along. I can vouch for that from my experience of people connecting me because I simply voiced my intentions, and someone always happens to know someone else who has that interest. I had no idea there was a whole tribe of people that I could connect with because I was too afraid to try it out before. I know this for sure now.

I also agree that it is so important to have a specific destination in mind. I almost took a job in Antigua, Guatemala knowing good and well that it wasn’t apart of my destination because I want to settle my student loan debt more than anything. It was a tough decision to make, and I chose to stick to my goal. I know that I made the right choice; otherwise, I would have only delayed arriving at my true destination. Even better, when I told Antigua my intentions, I was still offered to come anytime in the future.

While embarking on my new journey, I’ve had my ups and downs, but things are generally good because I know that I’m trying. This post just really hit home for me. Thank you for your insights!

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 17, 2014 at 6:59 pm

You’re welcome Jude :-). So awesome to hear about your recent adventures! Shoot me an email if you are ever stuck or puzzled.

Reply

Kelsey July 17, 2014 at 5:06 pm

Really great post and something I’ve been struggling with- clarity. Fear of saying exactly what I want because well, what if it is the wrong thing? But not deciding is most definitely more painful so thanks for the extra push to go for it!

Kelsey

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 17, 2014 at 6:59 pm

Totally Kelsey! And remember: not deciding is also making a decision :D

Reply

Sam July 17, 2014 at 5:32 pm

Solid advice. Great website, keep up the good work!

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 17, 2014 at 7:06 pm

Cheers Sam!

Reply

Simon July 17, 2014 at 11:00 pm

Another great piece of reading!

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 18, 2014 at 9:55 am

Cheers simon!

Reply

Monika July 18, 2014 at 12:46 pm

f*&k yeah!!! thank you for this one!

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 19, 2014 at 6:49 pm

Haha cheers Monika :-).

Reply

Robert Crotty July 28, 2014 at 1:24 pm

I think the most important part of the entire article is for people to realize, and accept, that there is no map to life…. and that clarity is the absolute, most important thing to have in life.

I am finally starting this realization, and trying to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life…..
if you could only see my browser right now (haha) I have a bunch of your articles up…
oh, and some of the best times in my life, were when I was riding motorcycles in Colombia for 10 days. :)
keep em coming!

Reply

Alexander Heyne August 4, 2014 at 1:30 pm

Absolutely Robert! 100% agree.

Reply

quici August 4, 2014 at 3:51 pm

My problem right now is figuring out where I want to be. I’ve always been so fickle, and scared of committing to one thing.

Reply

Alexander Heyne August 4, 2014 at 4:59 pm

Hi Quici,

Where you want to be, meaning geographically?

Reply

quici August 5, 2014 at 10:25 am

No, in terms of career. I’ve been dabbling in the health field, currently about to start my courses this fall for a Community Health major. Sciences aren’t my strong suit, but health related topics is what interests me. I also took a 2 year break from school to move to Colorado (from Florida) to explore what life has to offer, and it only further ensured my thoughts that all I want to do with my life is have fun.

Chris October 26, 2014 at 6:45 pm

Good shit Alex, gracias!

Reply

Alexander Heyne October 30, 2014 at 9:06 pm

Cheers Chris!

Reply

ThommasS October 29, 2014 at 4:35 am

One of the biggest frustration points for me was things not working linearly, you know, and also not having a lot of clarity of the aims I have in life, I have the visions but getting to write down that on a piece of paper always turns out into an ambiguous essay.

That lost feeling is messed up though. Sometimes I’ll be doing something productive and this sense will come from the pit of my stomach that sort of says ‘this is pointless there’s no point to doing this’.

The paradox being that, the only way to guarantee staying in the same place is NOT moving.

On Monday I had some momentum going, ignoring the ‘reason’s’ why I couldn’t move forward, but yesterday I was in a slump the WHOLE damn day none of the shit felt useful, even though I did manage to do some productive stuff.
This shit is hard man, I really wonder how those people who’re crushing it do it, because they seem like normal people on the surface.

After drawing up some goals or aims or whatever, and you’ve set out some action tasks to do. The trouble comes when you’re facing resistance and you don’t feel emotionally compelled to do the incremental action that serves your future.

The clarity would serve you here, by seeing clearly how this action affects that long term AND also what the benefit of it is in the moment, can be tough sometimes.

A mindset I’ve been experimenting with lately in getting going is:
Accepting that emotions will come up and down, a bunch of reason for why it’s pointless will come up but I must at least show up and do the physical actions of doing the task and forget about feelings and shit.

That’s how I was able to get those micro-momentums in the past. Now it’ s a matter of ‘getting back sooner’ and doing it more.

Cool post Alex.

-ThommasS

Reply

Jim January 20, 2015 at 1:12 pm

Alex, Great Post.
Your HEART is the map, and your brain is the navigator…Simple, not necessarily easy, but TOTALLY doable.
Peace,
Jim

Reply

James Mc Sherry March 22, 2015 at 12:46 pm

Nice post! Having the end goal and working back from it, including taking those first steps, any steps in the right direction is so important. Not waiting for the first steps to be served up either. I have lots of interests too so sometimes they can get in the way of each other and leave me a bit fazed out. Consistent actions, early starts. I also agree with the post above, the heart is the best map we have. If only we can cut out enough distractions to read it a little.

Great site and I really like your no BS message :)

Reply

Connor April 7, 2015 at 9:02 am

Enjoyed the article, thanks a lot!

Reply

abigail July 3, 2016 at 2:18 am

Omg ..some these are so true …its like we just sit and wait something happen when we know we need do somthing about it ..love your articles !!

Reply

Alexander Heyne July 18, 2016 at 5:02 am

Thanks Abigail

Reply

Leave a Comment

{ 1 trackback }

Previous post:

Next post: